if the mafia can learn to love

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

"I don't think I've ever done anything right in my life," Avi said quietly. "I've been impulsive and stupid, and I've blamed my brother for years for something that wasn't his fault."

[assassinrue]

"How could you know? It seems like too many people were trying to keep you out of the loop to protect you. It just didn't go as they planned."

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Avi closed her eyes and let his warmth soak into her. "I'm tired of people trying to protect me."

[assassinrue]

Nikolai smiled against her hair. "I think one day you'll come to miss it. But I understand."

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

"Some good it did, anyway," Avi murmured. "I met you and then everything went to hell." She smiled against his chest, knowing that if she could change that, she wouldn't. Whatever happened, this was worth it.

[assassinrue]

"Yeah that kinda happens around me." Nikolai sighed, but it was a happy sigh.

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

"I always thought I'd find some normal guy and settle down, but not until I was like twenty-five." Avi gave a short laugh. "I never wanted to be with a gang member, not even temporarily."

[assassinrue]

Nikolai flinched, pulling away slightly. "I can understand if what I am... is too much for you." His eyebrows pinched together as he spoke.

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

"No, no," Avi said quietly. "That's not what I'm saying." She pulled him back to her and hugged him tightly. "I'm saying that I'm willing to look past what you are because I like who you are. I always thought the gangster thing would matter to me, but it doesn't."

[assassinrue]

Nikolai sighed. "I hope you continue to think that way."

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Avi didn't respond to that. She couldn't make any promises, even though she wanted to believe her thoughts would never change. Would she still feel this way when things got worse?

[assassinrue]

Nikolai rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. He wondered how much more work Snake would have for him.

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Aveline ran her fingers down his chest and then grabbed a bunch of his shirt in her fist at the hemline. "What's wrong?"

[assassinrue]

"I'm just wondering what normal life is like. With parents and no gangs, proper schooling. Average."

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

"It's not all it's cracked up to be," Avi replied.

[assassinrue]

Nikolai shrugged a little. "The grass is always greener eh?"

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

"I suppose," Avi said. She shifted so she could look up at him. "Maybe it just means life sucks in general."

[assassinrue]

"Well. Aren't you a negative nancy." Nikolai chuckled.

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Avi smiled faintly. "Optimism isn't really in my nature."

[assassinrue]

Nikolai nodded. He could understand that. It was hard to be positive in a world like theirs, wrought with death and feuds and debts owed to mysterious men.