a n d // we \\ a l l // fall \\ d o w n

[Deleted]

He falling.

Falling into Colden's mouth as he slowly, so slowly, explored the ridge of lips. He didn't dare penetrate Colden's mouth, but his tongue, his lips, and even sometimes his teeth played against the plump flesh.

At one point, Asher's hands slid from the bed, guiding them so Colden was propped above him, bent over his chest, knees against Asher's hips.

At several points, Asher's hands dug into Colden's hips, gently rocking him. His lips moved from lips to neck, connecting there again.

A deep, rumbling growl filled him.

It was clear that Asher was not totally human, and that he desperately needed Colden.

"Please." It was a whimper.

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

Colden's legs squeezed Asher's hips and he was desperately clinging to his last shred of logic, "Asher," he looked down at him, hands tracing down his sides, "We shouldn't...not yet. It's too soon."

[Deleted]

Asher buried his face into the crook of Colden's neck. "I know. I know."

He lifted his head and fixed Colden with a burning stare.

"I do need to talk to you. About me. And what I am. But first - breakfast. You up for it?"

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

Colden's head tilted slightly, "Sure, breakfast sounds great."

[Deleted]

Asher nodded, swinging Colden over his back. He stepped out of the room in nothing but Colden and pants perched low on his hips. He padded to the cafeteria, ordered an omelet, and gestured to Colden at his back. "Whatcha want?"

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

Colden blinked in alarm and gradually recovered from being manhandled like that, "Oh, uh, I want a cheese omelet.""

[Deleted]

Asher nodded at the woman behind the counter, murmuring, "Thank you."

He turned, stepped up to a table, and sat down, cradling Colden in his arms.

"Sorry. You probably want to sit on your own."

His eyes were swimming.
God, desire.

Deep, dark pools of desire.

He couldn't have Colden.

Not yet.

Not yet.

"I'm a werewolf." It spilled out of his lips faster than he could even think.
He blinked at himself, but nodded. "Colden, I'm a werewolf Shadowhunter."

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

"Whoa, whoa, you talk so fast," Colden turned and cupped his face, "Take a breath."

He brushed his thumbs over his cheekbones, "So...You're a werewolf?"

[Deleted]

Asher squeezed his eyes, bobbing his head.

"I'm a werewolf."

Regret.

Pain.

Sadness.

Terrible, terrible grief.
And a longing that went past desire, past lust, past passion.

Onto love.

Onto mating.

Every wolf needs a mate, yes?

Isn't that the goal?

Every wolf needs an imprint, an equal, to stay sane.

And Asher was terrified that Colden was his mate.

He couldn't tell Colden, but it wouldn't be fair to lie to him.

He held a breath and cracked open his eyes.

"Are you mad at me?"

Fear, this time.

His voice was a low whimper of fear, of terrible fear that threatened to override his senses.

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

"No," Colden shook his head and pecked his lips for a moment, "I'm not mad at you at all, I promise."

He took a deep breath and managed a smile, "I hang around with a warlock. I've talked with vampires. I don't mind that you are a werewolf."

[Deleted]

Asher looked relieved.

But his chest was still tight.

"You're faking." His fingertips trailed over Colden's lips.

"There are some things we need to talk about. And not here. Breakfast in sound okay?"

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

Colden pressed a kiss to Asher's fingertips, "Alright, I understand. We can go somewhere else and talk,"

[Deleted]

Asher shoved away from the table, stalking to the food bar and grabbing their orders with a dip of his head. He pushed open the door of the cafeteria, ushered Colden through, and walked to the room, opening the door with his hip, holding it there until Colden was inside.

The room was simple - the bed was in the left corner, under the window. The bedside table was right beside it, like it was supposed to be. Headphones, a black MP3Player, a charger cord, and an alarm clock were on the bedside table. A desk was situated against the right wall, a desk chair put in front of it, but not wheeled under the desk. A black laptop sat on the desk, a bright-light lamp and some books crowded around it, along with coloring books, Sharpies, pens, pencils, markers, and a binder.

He had redecorated the day he had arrived, painting the walls white with occasional, colorful splatters, the floor a dark cherry wood. It was simple, and it was amazing, and it was perfect. A bookshelf was across from the bed, but no books were there yet - they were all on the desk.

He sat on the bed, legs crossed, the food cradled in his lap. His back was against the wall and he took in a deep, shuddering breath as he urged himself into better control.

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

Colden walked over to the bed and climbed on in front of him. He leaned back on his heels and frowned, "Asher, it's alright. You need to calm down."

[Deleted]

Asher's breathing leveled off as Colden sat on the bed.

It hurt when he wasn't within inches.

Asher passed Colden his plate and neatly cut up his omelet, taking the first bite, leaning his head against the wall with his eyes closed.

Pleasure was on his face.

"Alright."

He cleared his throat, sipped a nearby drink - tea, probably - and started to talk.

"I'm a werewolf. A rare breed, you could say. Obviously, I have mixed blood. My mother was pure werewolf, and my father pure Shadowhunter. I was raised in Ireland, and brought to America - my first Institute, too - when I was eleven. I was taken under scientific examination from the age of eleven to the age of, eh... What was it... Sixteen? Seventeen?" He gestured with his fork. "Somewhere around there. My breed of werewolf is Northern, somewhere in Korea were my father lived. I'm not built for America, which is why I came here, to the London Institute."

There were scars, there were tattoos.
He would have to explain those eventually - and the symbolic meaning of his hair, his entire physical self.

"And I'm built to be an Alpha wolf. And Alpha's have mates. I was sent here mostly to train, to limit myself to one thing at a time - this time, it was being a Shadowhunter." He bit into his omelet again. "But I found my mate here." The last sentence was whispered.

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

Colden stared at him as he silently ate his omelet. He was listening intently, focused on Asher entirely. He probably could have been more surprised, but Asher being a werewolf didn't make him a bad person. He knew plenty of kind, good Downworlders.

He set his fork down and licked his lips. His legs were crossed Indian style, his plate in his lap.

"You found your mate here?" he echoed, at first confused, "How do you know for sure?"

[Deleted]

Asher sighed softly.

"The right question is, Colden - how could I not? It's this... This gut - no, heart - feeling. I know when my mate is around. I know when my mate is with other people." Asher paused. "I'm pretty sure - I'll have to check with my Alpha - but I'm pretty sure you're my mate."

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

Colden peered across the bed at him, not looking upset, just confused, "So it's possible for your mate not to be a werewolf as well?" He set the plate aside and folded his hands in his lap.

[Deleted]

Asher nodded, finishing his omelet and standing to throw the plates and silverware away. He dusted off his hands and sat back down, against the pillows this time with his arms open. It was an invitation.

"Yes, my mate can be non-were. There are terms and conditions, but one of the top ones - you have to see me shift once, just once, so you know what you're getting into."

[нαℓƒ~мσση]

Colden crawled over upon invitation and laid down with him. He gave a one-shouldered shrug and smiled, "I've seen werewolves before. I don't mind seeing you shift."