Ruin A Wish Game

[mationix]

This is pretty self-explanatory.  The goal is to mess up a wish the person above you made.  Once you posted a reply to mess up the wish of the poster above you, write your own wish.  Be as horrible as you want, though still, abide by the LiE rules.  Have fun being a horrible person. I'm just kidding.

For example:
Poster 1: I wish that I could fly

Poster 2: Wish granted, but you get pecked to death by freaked out crows.
I wish that I had a cookie.

Poster 3: Wish granted, though the cookie has poison in it and you die.
I wish to have a puppy.

And so on.

I'll start.
I wish to get accepted in Bard college.

[Light]

Wish granted, though you fall down a manhole on the sidewalk and drown.
I wish I had a sonic screwdriver.

[mationix]

Wish granted, though the closest one to you is the Doctor's and you have to kill him to get it.
I wish I could meet Markus Zusak, author of The Book Thief.

[Light]

Wish Granted! You meet him, but halfway through the meeting, he cuts a vein in his hand on a piece of paper and bleeds out!
I wish I could know everything about a book without having to read it :'D

[mationix]

(D: Aw...)
Wish granted, but your mind can't keep up with all the information and you sink into a coma.
I wish my college apps were finished.

[Needmorefood]

Wish granted, but all of them got rejected and the only college left that will accept you is the Clown College
I wish I owned a pet dragon

[Blazy]

Wish granted, but the dragon got hungry and ate you for dinner!
I wish I had a jet pack.

[Етеяиiту]

Wish granted! But the force of fire burns your legs off and you bleed to death.

I wish I could go forward or back in time at will.

[Blazy]

Wish granted, but time travel is hard! and you get lost in the space-time continuum.

I wish I had super strength.

[Етеяиiту]

Wish granted! But you overestimate yourself and get crushed by what you try and pick up!

I wish I had wings

[Blazy]

Wish granted, but they're hot wings, and they're too hot to eat!

I wish I could fly like Superman.

[Етеяиiту]

{ahahahahaha that was funny!}}

Wish granted! But you cant draw your powers from the sun so you lose your ability after a little while.

I wish I was pretty

[Blazy]

Wish granted, but you turn out so beautiful, that your adoring fans go crazy and kill you.

I wish I had a tail!

[Етеяиiту]

Wish granted but its a lizard tail and people pull it off all the time and it hurts like 20x worse than child birth but it keeps growing back.

I wish My family was nice.

[Artēmïš]

(Oh can I join?)

Wish granted they get you a dog to make up for everything but it kills you because it's mean.

I wish I had all the books I could ever want.

[Етеяиiту]

Wish granted but the amout of books crushes you and you die.

I wish I could finish my homework.

[Artēmïš]

Wish granted however your homework is scattered all around your room and it all catches fire.

I wish my marks were better.

[Light]

Wish granted, but your teacher gets suspicious and fails you for suspecting that you were cheating!

I wish I was an owl.

[Artēmïš]

Which granted however you get attacked by a wolf which kills you.

I wish I were a dog

[~echo~]

Wish granted, but you are bitten by a rabid raccoon and you die.

I wish that I had perfect skin.