returning {to the past} -crystal

[~echo~]

When they arrived, Anita got out of the car and looked at him. "Thanks for the ride." With that, she entered her apartment.

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Alex sat in the car for a long time, the car running and in park. Part of him wanted to run after her, apologize for everything and kiss her, like that would make everything alright. The part that knew it wouldn't fix anything kept him rooted in his seat. He thought he'd gotten past this. Maybe not gotten over her, but past it, enough that he could go on with his life without missing her like hell. Seeing her again had brought it all crashing back down, and he felt like he was eighteen again, running away from her instead of fighting through their problems together. Mistake after mistake. Seemed the way his life was going to go.

[~echo~]

a(Timeskip)

Anita stared at her phone even after he had hung up. Just like that, he was gone, running off with another woman. She couldn't even bring herself to cry; she felt hollow, like a chocolate bunny at Easter. Her face was totally blank as she poked at her food. She wasn't hungry, but depressed. She missed Alex more than life itself. How had she gone so long without him?

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Alex sat awake in the hotel room he'd gotten for his family. His mom and Carlos were both asleep, but he could hardly keep his eyes closed. They kept popping open to stare at the ceiling, drift toward the window, or toward his cell phone that sat on the bedside table. He wanted to call Anita, just to hear her voice. Maybe he'd hang up after she answered--just to hear that one word--but no, she had caller ID. She'd know it was him.

[~echo~]

Anita looked down at her phone as she heard the vibration, letting out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding. She picked it up and softly said, "Hello?" The sadness in her voice was obvious.

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

For a moment, he was tempted to hang up anyway, but then the tone of her voice pierced right down to his heart. "Anita, it's me," he said softly, as to not wake the sleeping people in the room. "I just... I wanted to say I'm sorry. Again."

[~echo~]

"Hey, Alex," she replied softly. She heard his apology and gave a sniffly little laugh. It seemed almost absurd that he was apologizing to her, her having been such an idiot. "No, Alex. I'm sorry. I've been really stupid. I'm... I'm not with Derek anymore," she let the words slip out like a piece of lead, dropping down onto the floor and shattering any illusion of deception. Anita looked at the clock. Eleven pm. "Do you wanna... like, get some coffee with me? I need to see you and talk to you face to face."

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Alex took a few seconds to reply, mostly because he was trying to wrap his head around 'Derek and I aren't together anymore.' His thoughts ran wild. Was it because of him? Or worse, had that jerk done something to her? And then there was the shocking invitation to coffee. How many times did he have to screw up before this girl told him to get lost? "Yeah, Anita," he said gently. "I'd love to."

[~echo~]

She breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay," she murmured. "I'll see you there." A few minutes later, Anita sat in a dumpy little coffee place, sipping a cup of coffee and waiting for Alex to come. She wondered what she would say to him, and if he would even listen. She blinked and stared at a crack in the table where she was sitting.

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Alex looked incredibly rumpled when he entered the nearly empty coffee shop. His hair, though shorter than it once was, looked as messy as he'd worn it in high school. His shirt was the faded green tee he'd worn when he'd gotten into bed, and even his shoes looked tied sloppily. He'd clearly rushed to get out the door and come meet her. He spotted her and steeled himself before walking over to sit across from her. "Hola, Anita," he said softly.

[~echo~]

Anita looked up, her eyes softening somewhat when she saw him, despite his rumpled look. Anita didn't look her best either. "Hola, Alex." She paused for a minute, watching him quietly. Then, she spoke. "How are you? I'm sorry to have called you so late... but I really needed to see you.

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Alex shook his head slightly and smiled weekly. If only she knew, her call was the best thing that had happened since he got back to the motel. He and Carlos had gotten into a bit of a spat. Shocking, really, that I hadn't happened sooner. "Nah, I wasn't sleeping anyway. What is it?"

[~echo~]

Anita's eyes fell, feeling embarrassed to talk to him. "I miss you, Alex. And I understand if you don't want to get back together but... I just had to tell you in person."

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

No expression registered on Alex's face, a carefully controlled blankness. Finally, he said, "Not want to?" His voice was quiet, and would have been inaudible if not for the near-silent coffee shop. "I've been in love with you for eleven years. But I'm the one who screwed up. I had no right to expect you to want me again. But now?" He watched her uncertainly. "Are you sure that's what you want? That I'm what you want?"

[~echo~]

Her heart soared for a moment, and then he asked her if he was what she wanted. She gaped at him. "I have loved you for eleven years." She gazed deeply into his eyes, taking his hand in hers and grasping it almost desperately. "I want you more than anything, Alex. I have missed you so much..."

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Alex glanced down at their hands and then back into her soft brown eyes. "I thought you had moved on," he said. "You had that guy..." He trailed off and entwined his fingers with hers. "I never thought I'd see you again, let alone...."

[~echo~]

She swallowed nervously. "I tried to. I tried to distract myself through Derek, other guys. But I just couldn't forget you."

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Alex still felt guilty, but he couldn't help the smile that rose to his lips. "I'm so sorry I left you," he said. "I've never made a worse mistake."

[~echo~]

She knew it was what he wanted to hear, so she said, "I forgive you. I couldn't do anything but forgive you."

[ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟғʀᴏsᴛ]

Alex glanced around the place, meeting the gaze of the barista momentarily. He felt bad about coming here, just to leave without buying anything, but... "Would you like to leave? Some... time alone with you would be nice." Yeah, it would, after all these years.